A day of new beginnings

We had come 'home' to Tennessee. Our time in England had come to a natural end, and I found myself looking forward to being among the familiarity of home. We had rented a duplex from Mark, and were about to join his work supporting people in Asia. The shipping container with all our earthly goods was about to arrive, so for now we were 'camping' in an almost empty trailer home on the YWAM base in Adams, TN.

I was so happy. Looking forward to catching up with old friends. Seeing familiar places. Getting to shop at Target and eat Taco Bell. There was in me a sense of relief. Like I could breathe in the joy of my surroundings, and recoup from our last international move. I was anticipating tea parties with all the china I brought back, and long conversations about all that God had done in showing me his beauty in the English culture.

April 15th was a Wednesday, so we were off to staff meeting. The base welcomed us back with open arms, and we shared about our next steps. At the end of the meeting our base directors, life long friends, pulled us aside. They had a few visitors on the base from the FBI, and they had come to ask questions about us. I could see in my friends eyes an intensity of pain and concern. I didn't understand that at the time. In my mind the last trip to Africa and his run in with some government officials there may be why they were looking for us. It was of course tax day too, but I did our taxes early that year, so that couldn't be why.

He looked a bit panicked as we left, asked if we should leave our computer at the base for safe keeping. As we drove down the driveway out of the YWAM base all I could think of was how many dreams we'd spoken and prayed into on that drive, and here we were again embarking on a new portion of Gods calling for us.

He was griping my hand funny on the armrest between us. It wasn't how we held hands, so I asked him if he thought it was about the Africa trip, or if he knew what the FBI could be after. In my mind there was nothing I was guilty of, or involved with. He said something about internet issues, but nothing else. I felt perplexed by the whole growing situation. I was running events through my mind, kind of scanning memories, but found nothing of interest. Why was the FBI on the YWAM base, and why was his face becoming more and more panicked?

We arrived at the trailer and shortly after three unmarked cars followed. He ran out to the porch, but I heard them say they needed to only talk to me. There wasn't much to offer my way of hospitality, but I offered coffee, and a slightly broken chair.

My life was given a new beginning that day. I had one of those shocking out of body experiences. That out of body feeling lasted for quite a long time. It's still a bit unthinkable what was described to me. I often hesitate to share the whole story with new friends simply because of how hard it is to hear, and then the testimony of God I need to give afterwards.

I point to the disciples at this point. They were 12 of Jesus' best friends. They lived this wandering nomadic type life and shared some pretty wild and amazing things together. There was one who was trusted, loved, and yet was willing to betray for a moment of greedy pleasure. He intimately betrayed Jesus and his friends. He used a kiss, a symbol of intimacy, to hand Jesus life over to his executioners.

I feel that in a way I was like the disciples. Totally unaware that the intimate relationship that started for me when I was 17, was a tool that the thief (satan) was using to betray and destroy me. It was a tool because of the sin my husband entered into, and so willingly enjoyed rather than keeping his covenant with me. John 10:10 says: The thief comes to steal and kill and destroy. In the Message it ends with: I came so that they can have real and eternal life; more and better life than they ever dreamed.

Somehow the disciples went out in the power of love to transform nations and begin the early church. This is what I dream of. My life is still about reaching the unreached, and sharing the good news of the gospel to as many as will hear. I have seriously walked through the 'valley of death'. I found there grace and peace and a whole lot more of God than I ever imagined. New beginnings don't always look the way they do in movies, or wrap up neatly in a 1/2 hour segment. God promises to make all things new.. thanks for sharing this journey with me! I cannot wait to share more of what God's doing along the way :)

Deuteronomy 30:8-9

And you will make a new start, listening obediently to God, keeping all his commandments that I'm commanding you today. God, your God, will outdo himself in making things go well for you