I now drive a motorcycle; which is thrilling and scary most of the time. It's a Honda, small little thing, but I can go pretty fast :) There's times like today when I'm on a 'super high-way' and cars pull out right in front of me that I have to trust my brakes, or my steering. It's a region filled with other motorcycles weaving in and out of traffic, and taking front row at the stop lights. Life has gotten a lot simpler since my classmates loaned it to me, and I'm sure I've had a lot more adrenaline rushing through my system. I do sometimes miss the invincible feeling I had when I drove 'Big Red' a 3/4 ton pick-up, but I'm learning to trust my ability to get around.
In my spiritual life I have had to also grow in my areas of trust. My first big step into missions work came 4 days after a major missions conference, and an invitation to join a team in Honduras. I felt God said 'go' and so I went. I took off from Chicago during a major snowstorm, one connection later I was landing, alone in Central America. This was my third international voyage; I was 18. When I left Chicago I didn't know who would be meeting me at the airport, so I made a sign from the markers in my bag that colorfully read 'YWAM'. I made it off the plane onto the tarmac, cleared customs, and saw only non-westerners everywhere I looked. Holding my little sign I was beginning to feel anxious, again, when a friendly face greeted me. Relief washed over me, and I went on to have one of the more interesting foreign adventures of my career.
This week I get to grow in trusting God again. Do you ever wish you could just repeat an old exercise with God? I would love to just be hopping on a plane to a new destination to meet a team, build homes, and minister to children & the poor. If I'm honest though, I know that my current more difficult than I think I can handle situation; will keep me desperately seeking God. It's in the desperate moments that I grow, and I love growth. I won't groan about this too much longer, I know that I'm being prepared for something, and I have hope that each step made trusting God will bring me closer to Him.
So, God I trust you again with my life and Ethan's life. I trust that the destiny you have laid out for us is good and full of hope. AND I am so glad that we are moving forward, out of unbelief and into more faith. I am thankful that even though I can't see the path ahead, you are there, guiding me with your eye. Talk about a walk of faith, so glad to be on it with you.
Proverbs 3:5-6 has been my life verse ever since my Dad raised the question in the early dusky morning hours while I was half awake. It's a good verse, so when he asked me what my favorite verse was, this was my answer. Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. God is trustworthy, looking forward to seeing what he does in this situation, and also in my heart.
Praying you feel God ever present with you today, and in your journey to trusting him more!
